BB Senior Night 2019

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Photo Credit – Courtney Handl

Friday was the Girl’s last home basketball game of her high school career and Senior Night. We had 6 girls on the team who are graduating this year!

Before we even got to the staging area where we waited for the JV game to finish my daughter was already crying. As part of the senior night my husband and I were supposed to say something. He of course was going to be no help and I knew it so I wrote out what I wanted to say in advance.

The girl had written up something regarding her favorite memories and thanks she wanted to give to people which was read by the athletic director. Then one of her teammates had some really sweet things to say about her. Then it was my turn.

Our athletic director was very sweet and had told me in advance that if I got too choked up I could hand her my paper and she would finish it for me. I actually am proud to say I got through the whole thing and I think I did pretty good. It was a speech that was written to address my daughter so at one point I thought I should look at her while I was reading it. But when I looked up I saw she was sobbing and my husband with his arm around her was fighting tears himself. I immediately looked back down at the paper and knew that was going to be the only way I would get through this. By the end my hand was shaking so badly I’m not sure how I read the last words on the page.

So here is the speech that I read to honor my daughter. I’ve changed a couple names just because that’s what I do on this blog. But you can get the gist of it. I’m super proud of this girl and who she is becoming. And I have other big news that I will announce in a future post. But for now I want to honor her and her six years on the basketball court.

(As a reminder and to put some of this into perspective – the Girl is only 4’11” and plays what are usually considered tall girl sports, including Basketball and in Track & Field she competes in High Jump, Long Jump and Triple Jump.)


Five years ago, you told your father and me that you were going to try out with your friends for the school basketball team. We honestly expected we would be consoling you at the end of that week. We did something that day that we’ve never done since, something that many other people do every time you step on a court or a field. We underestimated you.

Obviously you made the team and that year you earned the nickname that you’ve lived up to ever since – Bulldog. You have more determination and heart than anyone I’ve met.

Every time you get on the basketball court, a track or a field you give everything you have to give. You never hold back, you never give up and you fear nothing. Our wish for you is to live your life the way you play basketball. Live life with your whole heart, never holding anything back, fearing nothing!

There is a Shakespeare quote that has become popular recently which always makes me think of you: “Though she be but little, she is fierce.” Don’t ever lose that!

I also want to thank The Girl’s friends who have supported and encouraged her over the past 5 years. Girl, your determination and heart will take you far in this world, but without the support of good friends it means nothing. I’ve seen you develop some amazing friendships throughout your basketball years. I still remember M. E. and M.K. yelling at you in 7th grade when you made mistakes, yet they were always the first to encourage you and support you too. And then there is K, who you did not want to even like in the beginning but is now one of your closest friends. And EB, who you immediately bonded with over some really bad puns. You only played together for one year and although she no longer plays basketball, she is here supporting you today. It has warmed my heart to see the loyalty and support between you and your friends. Never EVER underestimate the power of friendship. 

Girl, your father and I are beyond proud of who you have become and we are excited to see where your next adventure leads.  We are honored to call you our daughter – Always know that you are very much loved and we will always ALWAYS be your biggest fans.

 

 

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Snapshots

Someone recently was talking with me about how their memories were more like snapshots in an album than an old movie. Rather than being a continuous flow of events, they were more like single moments captured within a hazy fog of her life. Looking back was surreal and they almost felt disconnected from those memories. Like they were not really in them, but were on the outside looking in. The below was something I wrote up based on that discussion and some other discussions with other friends. This is a descriptive work of fiction, based in reality.

(Note: I like to write random little things like this – so hopefully you enjoy them too. These are kind of like little snapshots of my brain)


It was not the first snapshot in the album of her childhood – in fact it was not even really from her childhood. She was forty five at the time. But in many ways she was still a child. It was as if she was never able to fully emotionally evolve like most children so there was a part of her still stuck in adolescence. A part of her who never truly rebelled or tested her boundaries. A part of her who never became independent from her mother and the judgments and emotional entanglements that came with that relationship.

So here she was at forty five, the year she thought was going to be amazing! She had finally decided to stop worrying about getting older and instead start looking forward to her future with excitement and anticipation. And in some ways it was great, at least in the long term. Just not in the ways she had imagined. But then, that is life – it happens to us as we make other plans.

At forty five she was finally emerging from her emotional coma which she had been stuck in for so many years. One that she had never really even realized she was in. She was finally opening her eyes and beginning to see the real world come into focus. She was starting to see the emotional chains that had been stunting her for so long.

And all it took was the decline and death of her father.

Story Idea One

Something happened recently – not to me personally, but it was something in the news that was very distantly connected to me.  From that I wrote the beginning of a story idea with one change – I changed the main character from a man to a woman.  Now to decide what happens next.  Do I follow along closely with the “real” story or take it down a new path all it’s own?


She thought she had gotten away with it.  Was so convinced that she had put it all behind her.  So far behind that it was all a hazy memory, more like the remnants of a dream that linger after you’ve been awake for awhile and cleared the sleep from your eyes.

At least that was until the day they showed up at her office and she felt the cold hard steel of shackles at her wrists.  At that moment the memories became the cold hard reality.  At that moment her life changed dramatically, just like it had that cold October day fifteen years before. . .

Untitled Story – Part 2 (Rich & Lucy)

If you are just coming across this – you can read the first two installments of this story at these links:

Untitled Story – Prologue

Untitled Story – Part 1 (Lucy)


Rich stands by the side of the car soaking in the warm sunlight.  This is his favorite part of his day, picking her up after school.  Today as he waits to see her blonde pigtails bouncing through the throng of children stampeding down the steps, he lets himself feel hope.  Hope for a bright future where fate would finally deal him a good hand to make up for all that had been his past few years.  Continue reading “Untitled Story – Part 2 (Rich & Lucy)”

The Glass Ball (Writing Prompt)

This short story was inspired by The Haunted Wordsmith’s daily prompt.  I’ve chosen to use all the prompts for this story – the picture and the words:  Cloud, Fluff and Whipped Cream.  Enjoy!


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Monica thanked the waitress as she set the cup of steaming coffee topped with whipped cream on the table in front of her.  This was Monica’s favorite place to come, a little coffee shop tucked away within an old brick building, across from the town’s park.  She made a point to spend a few hours each week meandering through the park and always ended up coming in to enjoy their delicious brew on the patio before heading home and back to reality.  It was her time to recharge and regroup.

Today’s plans had not originally included a visit, however her fiance, Scott, had called to cancel their lunch plans.  Some last minute changes to a project he was working on with the mayor necessitated a working lunch for him today.  So Monica decided to take advantage of some unexpected free time. Continue reading “The Glass Ball (Writing Prompt)”

Untitled Story – Part 1 (Lucy)

I’ve still not come up with a name for this story – I will try to get one figured out soon.  I have a basic outline of where this is going but it could change along the way.  Stories tend to have a mind of their own at times and I think this one is definitely going to be like that.  If you missed it, I recommend going back and reading the Prologue HERE.


“How’s my angel?”

Lucy rolls her eyes as she swings her bag over her shoulder. She is almost six now and too big to be Daddy’s angel anymore.  Or at least that is what she claims.  Secretly she loves that her dad gives her so much attention. The other girls in her class rarely have their dads pick them up.  Lucy’s dad always picks her up from school and always greets her with names like angel or princess or even silly things like, “How’s my pony wony doing today?” Continue reading “Untitled Story – Part 1 (Lucy)”

False Guilt

Funny how things all of a sudden one day become more clear to us.   Although they still may not be clear enough for us to fully see the big picture.  Or maybe they are that clear, but we still can’t totally change the picture to be what we know it should be.

Excuse me, I’m rambling.  My point of this is that it has recently become clear to me that I live with a lot of false guilt.  To the point where I often have a hard time working through to figure out what is legitimate guilt and what is false guilt.

What do I mean by false guilt you may ask? (Some of you know EXACTLY what I am talking about though.)  I tend to take on feelings of guilt any time I do or say something that may make someone else feel bad, may hurt their feelings or may inconvenience them.

It is really unhealthy.  In addition to adding a lot of unnecessary stress and anxiety to my life, it also causes me to take on too much and to burn myself out because I don’t say No.  I burn out physically, mentally and emotionally. Continue reading “False Guilt”