Today is the Day

I’m tired of being afraid, of doubting myself, of living adventures only through books because I hide my fear behind being “safe” and “reasonable”.

I’m tired of only seeing my dreams as someday and never actually doing anything to pursue them. Never taking a risk. Convincing myself if they are meant to be they will somehow just fall into my lap. Never stepping out of my comfort zone because God forbid – I might fail!

Continue reading “Today is the Day”

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I Did It!

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Honestly there is not much more to say – but inside me there is a big King of the Mountain game being played. Have you seen those videos of the miniature baby goats dressed in pajamas jumping all over the place, falling over and knocking into each other? (The Girl LOVES those videos!) Well, that is what is going on in my head right now with my emotions, and in my stomach. There is a regular ole crazy party going on in there and everyone is invited – joy, hope, excitement, fear, doubt, insecurity, confidence – they are ALL there!

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My Fear Resume put into Practice

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So I did it!! I mentioned in my previous post that I had started a Fear Resume. Today I had the opportunity to put it into practice. Actually all weekend and last night too.

I had something pop up the end of last week related to work which resulted in a meeting today. As usual I started spinning dialogues in my mind of how this meeting would go. I knew it was needed, but it could go really good or it could go really bad. However, I decided that I was going to do all I could to not worry myself and cause myself anxiety over it. After all, freaking out in the days before the meeting would not give me any benefit. It would only cause me harm mentally and emotionally.

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My Fear Resume

Earlier this week I attended a PBWC conference (Professional Business Women of California). I had some mixed feelings about it. I’ve been to one before, but it was years ago. This one had some truly inspiring speakers but overall it fell a bit short for me. The conference theme this year was Rise Up, Lift Up. Good theme – but I just found some of the topics and speakers to be a bit lackluster. But then there are probably those who are raving about everything right now – so to each his (or her) own. You can’t please everyone!

However, I DID get some good tidbits out of this conference (as well as some good quality time with a couple women who I adore and don’t get to see as much as I would like even though we work for the same company!)

PBWC 2018
Had fun with these ladies. We look like we could totally be TROUBLE!

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Liebster Award: Discover New Blogs

This post is a LONG time in coming.   So first things first – thank you to James at BlottedInc for the nomination.  I bet you had given up on me!

I did a little bit of digging (but not quite enough for me to tell you to take my word for it) and found that this award is a way for bloggers to recognize other blogs they enjoy and share them with others – hence the “Discover New Blogs” caption.  Supposedly it is derived from the German word that means “beloved or dear” in English.  If you know German and want to confirm that for me – that would be awesome!  The important thing is that someone thought I was important enough to get this award and I’ve put a few weeks of thought into how to answer back!  I found a BUNCH of graphics for this and of course they all say they are the official one.  The one on BlottedInc’s post references a Global Aussie but my internet does not like the link so I’m going with one that I found that I think is pretty and is pink! Continue reading “Liebster Award: Discover New Blogs”

Why I Procrastinate

Just recently I came to grasp that yet another one of my “truths” that I’ve lived by is in reality not true at all.  This particular false truth is related to why I procrastinate.

I was raised by two parents who have a very strong work ethic and this was passed down to my brother and me.  In my mind, procrastinating has always been associated with laziness.  So when I find myself in the throes of it, focusing on minor or meaningless tasks to avoid the thing I should really be doing, I chalk it up to me being lazy.

When this comes about regarding my career, I really start to get mad and beat myself up.   Which in turn gets the anxiety cycle going like an out of control merry-go-round.  (I’m the crazy lady holding onto the unicorn for dear life hoping I don’t somehow end up impaling myself!) Continue reading “Why I Procrastinate”

My Journey from Anxiety to Calm

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I’m finding since I started blogging my stress levels have reduced. The stresses of my job and my life don’t cause me as much anxiety. And when I do start to feel anxious I’m able to talk myself down more quickly than in the past. I’m able to find more joy and laughter in my daily life. To keep a more realistic view of my responsibilities and expectations. In a nutshell, my life is more balanced.

This has not always been the case though. So what changed, you may ask?

Let me take a step back and share an “aha” moment that came to me recently while reading some words by Brené Brown about calm and stillness. *

Continue reading “My Journey from Anxiety to Calm”